People Suck

This post is for me to vent and for my family and friends who want to see my deep dark side. I am so angry and hurt. I bent over backwards for a lady and she screwed me and played like she had no idea. What the heck is a matter with people and why do I have to be so nice. Why, why, why!!! I'm grateful to Heavenly Father for amazing control. Control over emotions, feelings, temper and the desire to spout so many bad words and hurl them at this lady and not doing it. I would hate myself after and could get me into a lot of trouble but then I stew over it for days wishing I would have said what was on my mind. But all in all I know that it would make no difference. People justify in there own minds that they are right. I hope she enjoys hell. Apart of me does and then oddly enough the other part of me hopes and wishes that she finds peace, love, and happiness and that the money she took from me will help her out. I hate that I have compassion for her but I love that I have compassion for her. How can I feel two ways and it depends on the time of day as to which feeling is stronger. I'm grateful to Heavenly Father who loves me enough to give me the gift of control, love, and compassion. But the natural man in me wants to fight it and hate her. Over all I know that if I saw her I would still smile and I would still say hello because I am just that way. And dadgummit I'm glad I'm that way for the most part. Just so some of you know we got sued. And the judge could have cared less about anything we said and awarded her. And she knew, because it was explained to her several times but of course she claims she didn't know and the contract was crappy so that's our bad and boy are we paying for it and it didn't even matter that we had a witness nothing mattered. All I know is that Adam and I have worked our butts off for everything we have. We are honest to a fault, honest in our dealings, we pay our debts and obligations and everything we have we have worked for. Nothing has been handed to us. We can attend the temple worthily and partake of the blessings there. We have a wonderful, beautiful family, great healthy kids. And despite everything I am happy and I'm still smiling, and I'm still so greatful to the lord for the many blessings he's given to me because I have so much more than most. I love the Lord, My Heavenly Father, the gospel, my husband, my kids, my family, my friends and sometimes when it's all said and done my trials (not right now but I know that I'll look back on this some day and say wow we made it through that can you believe it).